Lost in the Crowd?

A friend of mine once sought my help with a problem he was having praying in synagogue. "It seems like they are just rushing through the prayers and not focusing on what the words say or mean," he complained. "How can I keep up with the congregation and still focus on what the prayers mean to me?" He is certainly not alone in his dilemma. Some communities seem to be hurrying through the prayer as if they must be completed within a few minutes time. In others the leader simply chants the closing lines of each prayer and seems to be ignoring the majority of the text.

An individual who is not well learned in Hebrew faces that additional problem of struggling through the service, trying to understand what the text is saying. For Jews-by-Choice who were raised in a Christian tradition, Jewish worship seems at first to be a foreign culture. In Christian worship nearly everything is either done by the congregation as a whole or by a pastor, liturgist, or choir while the individual listens. Jewish worship seems confusing. One wonders, Should I pray as an individual and try to connect with G-d alone? What then is the purpose of group worship? Or should I try to keep up with the congregation and miss the meaning and significance of the rest of the prayers.

Fortunately there is a solution to the problem. I have a few suggestions that should help make congregational prayer more meaningful.

"Go Forth and Learn"

If Jewish worship is new to you, one of the first things you should do is attend a class to learn what Jewish worship is: the meaning of prayer, the purpose of praying in Hebrew, the text and meaning of the prayers, how the service is structured, and other important details. Learning the structure and purpose of Jewish prayer will make the service less confusing and more meaningful. Many synagogues have a "learner's minyan," a separate service where people who are uncomfortable in the main service can pray at a slower pace. Often the leader of a learner's minyan will explain what is happening in more detail than is possible in a larger group.

"It's My Turn"

Every Jewish service offers a time for individual prayer. The Amidah, also called the Shemonah Esrei, is a personal prayer. The text focuses on themes that have meaning both for the individual and the community. Take you time when praying the Amidah. This is your time to focus on your individual thoughts. Begin by reading the text. Many times while reading the text I have been able to focus a very personal need that I have been able to clarify because the text has taken on a new, more personal meaning while I was praying. At times my mind wanders from the text to a particular concern that is on my mind. I turn my attention to that situation and talk to G-d about it in my own words. Important as the text is, communicating with Hahsem is most important! 

          Focus on your own personal thoughts and needs during this time. Don't worry about hurrying through the text to "catch up" with everyone else. Pray at your own pace, even in your own words. G-d will hear and understand!

Together as One

Becoming part of a people, part of a community is also important. Learning to pray "as one" binds us together. Families, congregations, communities, the Jewish people as a whole have needs just as individuals do. Therefore it is vitally important that we as individuals pray together during the reader's repetition of the  Amidah, there is an addition to the third prayer that is called the Kidushah. The kidushah declares the holiness of G-d. It requires congregational responses. Learn the text and how it is done. Make a special effort to participate in chanting the responses. Another important prayer if the Kaddish. It is recited several times during the service. A special version of the Kaddish is recited by persons who are in mourning or are observing the anniversary of a loved one. There is a congregational response in the Kaddish as well. Make this one of the first congregational prayers that you learn. You will soon understand the importance of being "together as one."

Jewish prayer is not easy. There is a reason why it is called the "work of the heart." By putting forth the effort to learn how to pray as a Jew, you will experience the great spiritual and personal benefits of Jewish prayer. Praying with the community doesn't need to feel like being lost in the crowd. The more you pray with your fellow Jews "together as one," the more natural it will become. 

As always I welcome your comments and questions. May you go from strength to strength!

Related links:

Siddur On-line (Chai Lifeline)

Jewish Prayer (Chabad)

Learning to Pray (My Jewish Learning)