(Note to my dear Jewish friends: Some of you may take exception to some opinions I express here. I am aware of the many halachic issues surrounding conversion. I leave those issues to our learned rabbis, who are knowledgeable in such matters.)
We are as Jewish as anyone who was born to a Jewish mother.
We have the same privileges and responsibilities as every other Jew. We can be given an aliyah during the Torah service. We are obligated to study Torah and follow the mitzvot. We are required to create a Jewish home. We have a Hebrew name. (My Hebrew name [in the Orthodox tradition] happens to be Avraham ben Avraham avinu.) Some people have the mistaken idea that we gerim ("converts") fall into some special, second class category. I suspect that this misconception comes from the fact that there are a few halachic regulations related to our role in the community that are somewhat different. For example, marriage between a cohen ( a member of the priestly clan) and a convert is prohibited. That in no way lessens our status as Jews. To adapt an old saying, "We are just like every other Jew, only more so!"
The community has special obligations toward us.
There are two mitzvot that deal with the relationship of the community to a Jew-by-Choice. Jews are obligated to "love the convert." Ahavat Israel (love of one's fellow Jew) takes on a new dimension when a newly converted Jew is involved. The convert has in a very tangible sense left his world behind when he joins the Jewish people. His place of worship, much of his support network, even his method of social networking has changed. Recognizing these challenges, rabbis and sages over the centuries have challenged the Jewish community to give special emotional, social and spiritual support to these brave newcomers.The second commandment is not to remind a new Jew of his past. It is difficult enough to launch out of one's spiritual comfort zone into a strange new world! We need and want to be a part of the community. That is nearly impossible when one is constantly reminded that he or she is "different."
It is unfortunate that Jews-by-Choice are not always as freely welcomed as we should be. The good news is that very many of our fellow Jews are ready and willing to help us learn and grow. Personally I have been invited to share Shabbos with many new friends including a few Orthodox rabbis. When we are welcomed in such a sincere manner, we are much more likely to remain involved, practicing Jews.
We bring a vital spirit and commitment with us.
Becoming a Jew is not an easy process, nor should it be. This is a lifetime commitment and one that has many consequences. While I was preparing for my conversion, I attended a class taught by a learned Philadelphia rabbi. In the middle of this lecture, the rabbi was interrupted by a messenger. This by itself was most unusual, but his announcement was absolutely stunning. "Scud missiles have landed in a residential area of Tel Aviv. Casualties are unknown." As we sat contemplating the meaning for us as prospective Jews, he reminded us, "It costs to be a Jew."
We who enter the community through the door of conversion know that this is serious business. It is not something that we undertake like some New Age quest, nor do we begin this journey simply to please prospective in-laws. I cannot deny that there are some who do not take this step with noble intention, but by far the majority of Jews-by-Choice whom I have met do so with open eyes and willing hearts. One young woman, whom I know personally, serves as an example. She worked and studied for three years to convince her rabbi of her sincerity. I first met her at an Orthodox minyan that I attend weekly. The group meets at the offices of a local rabbi. Since before her conversion, she has come faithfully, sitting alone in a separate office and davening. By her own choice, she then prepares our traditional bagels-and-lox breakfast for us. While this is only a small gesture on her part, to us it is a symbol of her commitment to the community. Toasting bagels is not a great undertaking, but she does it because she sees it as her own task. She brings that same sense of ownership to studying Torah and performing many other duties and mitzvot.
We are one people. Whether born into the family or adopted, we are all part of Am Yisrael. As the Torah suggests, when we come together we can truly impact the world. And, I believe, together we can merit to see the arrival of our righteous Moshiach. May he come speedily and in our days!
Related Links:
Welcoming the Convert into the Community
"Why is Conversion to Judaism so Hard?"
"Why do Rabbis Discourage Conversion?"
The community has special obligations toward us.
There are two mitzvot that deal with the relationship of the community to a Jew-by-Choice. Jews are obligated to "love the convert." Ahavat Israel (love of one's fellow Jew) takes on a new dimension when a newly converted Jew is involved. The convert has in a very tangible sense left his world behind when he joins the Jewish people. His place of worship, much of his support network, even his method of social networking has changed. Recognizing these challenges, rabbis and sages over the centuries have challenged the Jewish community to give special emotional, social and spiritual support to these brave newcomers.The second commandment is not to remind a new Jew of his past. It is difficult enough to launch out of one's spiritual comfort zone into a strange new world! We need and want to be a part of the community. That is nearly impossible when one is constantly reminded that he or she is "different."
It is unfortunate that Jews-by-Choice are not always as freely welcomed as we should be. The good news is that very many of our fellow Jews are ready and willing to help us learn and grow. Personally I have been invited to share Shabbos with many new friends including a few Orthodox rabbis. When we are welcomed in such a sincere manner, we are much more likely to remain involved, practicing Jews.
We bring a vital spirit and commitment with us.
Becoming a Jew is not an easy process, nor should it be. This is a lifetime commitment and one that has many consequences. While I was preparing for my conversion, I attended a class taught by a learned Philadelphia rabbi. In the middle of this lecture, the rabbi was interrupted by a messenger. This by itself was most unusual, but his announcement was absolutely stunning. "Scud missiles have landed in a residential area of Tel Aviv. Casualties are unknown." As we sat contemplating the meaning for us as prospective Jews, he reminded us, "It costs to be a Jew."
We who enter the community through the door of conversion know that this is serious business. It is not something that we undertake like some New Age quest, nor do we begin this journey simply to please prospective in-laws. I cannot deny that there are some who do not take this step with noble intention, but by far the majority of Jews-by-Choice whom I have met do so with open eyes and willing hearts. One young woman, whom I know personally, serves as an example. She worked and studied for three years to convince her rabbi of her sincerity. I first met her at an Orthodox minyan that I attend weekly. The group meets at the offices of a local rabbi. Since before her conversion, she has come faithfully, sitting alone in a separate office and davening. By her own choice, she then prepares our traditional bagels-and-lox breakfast for us. While this is only a small gesture on her part, to us it is a symbol of her commitment to the community. Toasting bagels is not a great undertaking, but she does it because she sees it as her own task. She brings that same sense of ownership to studying Torah and performing many other duties and mitzvot.
We are one people. Whether born into the family or adopted, we are all part of Am Yisrael. As the Torah suggests, when we come together we can truly impact the world. And, I believe, together we can merit to see the arrival of our righteous Moshiach. May he come speedily and in our days!
Related Links:
Welcoming the Convert into the Community
"Why is Conversion to Judaism so Hard?"
"Why do Rabbis Discourage Conversion?"
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